She arrived in Hollywood already with an acid tongue and a smile like sucking lemons.
She didn’t suffer fools gladly or otherwise.
For she knew she had it in her to make herself a star.
They said she came straight off the boat with a belly full of mossy bitterness.
Who wouldn’t be a little put out?
She’d already done the casting couch in Europe but had to start again here, looking on, green as envious galbanum, while other girls got the good parts over her.
She? Who had played Christian martyrs and vestal virgins in some of the biggest movies that had ever been.
She? Whose steely glamour and sexuality on ice had rocked a continent.
So she had a past! What of it?
She’d washed that chemically clean in aldehydic soap in London: lost her Mademoiselle along, conveniently enough, with her memories of Parisian perversity and her Berlin bob cut not blonde hair.
That’s all history now: gone up in hydrogen peroxide now.
She’s a Miss now!
And she’s ready now, for the first screen test close up of a thousand big screen close ups of a career she knows will last for years, for decades even.
They may have her flowery while on sound stage, a Continental bouquet of iris, rose, jasmine and carnation: all swoons and bias cuts.
But it’s the narcissi that sing most from her heart.
It’s the leather gloves she pulls on like a women who can drive fast and throw punches hard that gives a clue to her mind.
The gritty patchouli oil she stabs at her neck that speaks from her damaged soul.
She’s a beauty, but she ain’t pretty.
She’s a star and she’s a bitch and she knows it.
Miss Dior is anything but polite.
In her best formulations she is a ‘sharp as a card shark turned killer’ perfume.
She is the boudoir and bar brawl heroine throwing punches like an against-the-wall gangster in a Golden Age Ballgown by Head, photographed by Horst.
She is the collision of glamour and catastrophe.
A few smacks across the face by a green oakmoss hand in an aldehyde dry-cleaned leather glove goes by way of introduction.
If she then feigns to mellow into iris and rose and hints at sandalwood softness in her heart, beware.
Beware, for this is another of her Oscar-wining transformations, soon enough dirty patchouli, salty amber and wild grass will be back to give you a friction burn of a dry, dry down.
Despite her femme nomenclature, this early doors Bonnie Parker is butch enough to be sure.
A woman should wear it if only she’s as happy wearing a holster. And a guy, well he just as to be good with it.
Hell, if anyone calls him, she’s been in enough Western’s: Miss Dior will be by his side for the shoot out.
One knows that these days Miss Dior has become ‘Originale’, however, for The Dandy there is can only ever be one Mademoiselle.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy.
The Perfumed Dandy. 
I wore Miss Dior in my teens, the houndstooth splash bottle; and I wore the spray edt in the ribbed bottle in my 20s. I understand – now – what you mean about the brazen bitchiness of this fragrance, but back then nobody seemed to think it odd that a girl or young woman would choose such a scent. We didn’t have fruity Brittney fragrances or Pink Sugar. Imagine!
Dear Lily
You make the best of points.
Of course on its release and for years after Miss Dior occupied the mainstream, women were free to express a complex kind of femininity with fragrances that were equally multi-layered.
If any evidence is required how things have changed for the worse, to a cartoon-ish, candy-floss pink paired down idea of the female persona then I’d suggest a quick sniff of the truly underwhelming perfume that now takes the name of Miss Dior in vain.
Gosh, The Dandy sounds a little irked… he is!!
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
“a cartoon-ish, candy-floss pink paired down idea of the female persona” 🙂
Dearest Sylvia
Ooops, perhaps that was a little to assertive of The Dandy, but I do rather think that the preposterous preponderance of fruity patchoulis and vanilla gourmands, or worse still a collision of the two is a reductive road for fragrance to be going down.
However, there is some hope with the ‘nouvelles chypres’ that seem to be making an appearance of late…
We live in hope.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
I may be that girl who is as comfortable wearing a holster as an evening gown. You describe it perfectly, of course you made me laugh. It does have a sort of multiple personality, doesn’t it? The one your left with is the ‘mean girl’. I love the warning, “Beware, for this is another of her award winning performances…” Yes, yes it is.
Great review, Dandy.
Gripping
Do you remember the pop song some years ago that went, “I’m a bitch, I’m a mother, I’m a lover, I’m a saint, I’m a sinner…” etc.? That must be Miss Dior – multiple personalities.
Dear Lily
I had to go and listen to that track again…. perfect!!
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Yes! That’s exactly who she is. Good call.
Dear Gripping
I love the girl with a holster in a ball gown and so glad you identify with her!
Quite right, Miss Dior does have multiple personalities, and she changes as so many of us do according to the circumstances she finds herself.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Dear Mr Dandy
I tried this last week and thought it very similar to Coco Mademoiselle, of which I’m not a die hard fan. However, your review is irresistible and I’m going to try again with a more open mind.
I’m going to give the bitch another chance.
Your Friend
IScent
Dearest Iscent
Now… and I’m beginning to sound like a stuck record… which version were you sampling?
The “new” Miss Dior has a similar patchouli, citrus, floral shape to Coco Mademoiselle (the most successful accident in perfumery by the way), but I’m not so clear that the old or “Originale” is as close to it… though there are more aldehydes in the Chanel than are ever really acknowledged.
I might well go and give all a comparison sniff this afternoon….
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Dear Mr Dandy, it was a brand new version from my local House of Fraser. I’m going to give it another go.
Your friend
IScent
Dearest I
Did it look like the bottle above?
If it didn’t it will probably smell very different indeed to the fragrance I’m describing here…
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Your take on this perfume is so far away from mine that I can’t believe we worethe same perfume 😉
Dear Undina
Fascinating!
Two possibilities… one we just get different things from Miss Dior or two we could be trying completely different versions.
The current “Miss Dior”, which is a slightly rejigged version of Miss Dior Cherie has nothing to do with the older versions and the current incarnation now known as “Miss Dior Originale”.
Would be really very interested to know whether you are wearing the oakmoss, aldehyde and galbanum heavy original or the new floral fruit-chouli that has sequestered the name.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Dear Dandy,
Trust me, I have been around perfumes long enough to live through both reformulations (for Miss Dior AND Miss Dior Cherie) and the most recent renaming game. Since it’s one of my favorite perfumes, I own a couple of vintage extrait bottles, vintage EdT and one before the last modern version. None of them conjures for me those images you’ve used for your story part of the review. But it’s fine – we all seeand smell things differently.
Dear Undina
Absolutely, we all see and smell things differently, and that is one of the principle joys of perfume!
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
I adore the swan ad.
Dear Natalie
Welcome to The Dandy’s… do make yourself at home!
Isn’t it beautiful!?!
I believe it’s another wonderful piece of work by Gruau who produced so many amazing images for Dior and changes the whole world of fashion illustration.
I’ll be sure to use plenty more where that came from in future reviews…
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
I love the swan drawn by Gruau. It’s one of my faves. I posted it a long time ago when I had the Spanish version of my blog.
This is a lovely review as usual
XOXO
Dear Luixe
Isn’t it just beautiful? Like nearly all the work of the time done for Dior by this genius.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Yes, Dandy. It’s quite beautiful
XOXO
“She is the collision of glamour and catastrophe.” Oh so insightful…
Dear Ms V
I wonder is all stardom is just such a kind of car crash….
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Regarding le sujet above – I believe this, the stereotypical unchallenging not to say one-dimensional and boring olfactory image of femininity bottled by many big brands… is one of the reasons why so many contemporary women turn to niche brands. Or wear pour home, or unisex/shared. This adds another interesting twist to your quest of course. On your male skin the female aspect/character/anima connected/defined/suggested to the perfume becomes something more multi-faceted. Etc etc…
Dearest Sylvia
How right you are… what I have discovered with the careful guidance of everyone who takes the time to suggest new perfumes and select the next steps in my olfactory journey, is that fragrance’s past is filled with complex, sensitive and sometimes even contradictory images and aromas of femininity, most created by ‘the main stream’.
I would like to think that people smelling the scents of our times would be presented with equally as diverse and detailed a portrait, but I fear this might not be the case…. unless an awful lot of vintage survives.
In the present though, this varied back catalogue provides men prepared to travel over to ‘female side’ with a wealth of new experience, which I am heartily grateful to enjoy.
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Dear Dandy,
it is quite interesting (and somewhat surprising in some ways) that in this case it would mean that previous decades of mass-market perfumery allowed or encouraged a more complex female identity than the present does. In contrast to what society did. That would suggest that the perfume houses were indeed more creative and free and avant-garde and served an important function in breaking glass ceilings and challenging identity norms. One wonders what happened between Chanel no 5 and say… much of what is going on now? And why? This should be talked about more. You have planted the seeds for many great questions.
Velvetly,
S.
Dandy, is there really such a thing as contradiction in perfume?
S.
Dearest Sylvia
Is a coincidence that in the early and middle parts of the twentieth century, from which many of our greatest perfumes come, many powerful women held senior positions and carved out Empires in the worlds of fashion, beauty and fragrance?
Is it more than mere happenstance that these days the ownership of nearly all the major perfume brands is vested in huge faceless corporations, still overwhelmingly run by faceless men?
The Dandy but asks?
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy
Oh, I want to know this woman. I have a feeling we’d be fast friends.
Dear Nancy
Do you know she and The Dandy have it it off like a house on fire!
Yours ever
The Perfumed Dandy